My unexpected prison family journey began in 2011. It rocked my world when we received that middle of the night phone call about my son’s arrest. Then months later after his sentencing to state prison, the rocking gave way to shaking.
Honestly, I felt like my life ended as I did not know how to move on with life. I secluded myself inside my own home—allowing the enemy to erect bars of despair and depression around my heart.
As I cried in my anguish, I asked the questions most people ask when they encounter a tragedy in their lives, “Where was God when this happened? Why didn’t HE stop it?”
On the inside of prison, my son surrendered his life to Jesus, and he began to walk in a new-found freedom that doesn’t depend on where you live. Yet, I became shackled to guilt, shame, and condemnation to the point of barely functioning in life while living in the free world.
One day while cleaning house, my memory replayed part of a sermon I heard sometime before. I imagined in my mind’s eye that people were walking away from Jesus, then I heard, “Do you also want to go away?” (John 6:67)
I knew it was Jesus, and it felt like the question was directed right at me. Tears pooled in my eyes as I thought about this. My life before receiving Christ was not good. My life after receiving Christ was better, but this felt far worse. How could I possibly have even thought about trying to make it through such a difficult ordeal without Jesus?
I remembered Peter’s response to Jesus and I spoke them out loud, “Lord, where would I go? Your words give life.” [based on John 6:68.]
At that moment of recommitment, I felt a ray of hope beam down over my darkened soul. Hope that God will cause everything to work together for good (Rom 8:28).
The process of walking out of the pain and torment began. You see, my friend, some trials we must walk through. We cannot skip the renewal process.
Little by little, the Lord healed my pain, and removed the shackles of shame, guilt, worry, cynicism, dread, doubt, and fear that accompanies the trauma of having someone you love being sent to prison.
In John 6, the other disciples left Jesus because they found His teachings too difficult, they refused to accept it, and became offended it by it.
We must guard ourselves against being offended by the truth of the Word of God and rejecting it. Following the Lord’s commands is not being legalistic, it’s loving Jesus.
Jesus said, “If you love me, obey my commandments. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate who will never leave you. He is the Holy Spirit, who leads into all truth” (John 14:15-17a NLT).
When we love, it is not a “have to” but a “get to.” Our love for our Savior propels us to want to obey Him. And the blessing on top of that is that we have the Holy Spirit, who leads us!
The Holy Spirit broke the shackles of guilt, shame, and condemnation off of my life. Now I am free to live and enjoy new life. This freedom process began with the commitment to remain with Jesus.
My friend, wherever you are in your walk with the Lord, will you commit (or recommit) to remaining with Him today? When you make that choice, the shackles will break off and the freedom process will begin!
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